As I pounder this word “Endure” and look up the definition. I even look up other words to get a broader perspective of the passage in Acts 13:18
HE endured their conduct for about forty years in the desert.

We know the story of how the Israelites’ were wondering in the desert for forty years complaining and doing all sorts of detestable things against God. Yet he endured their conduct, still providing, still leading, and still teaching, STILL LOVING them.

Endure / Tolerate / Permit / Allow

It is so hard to understand this, how God endured their attitudes, their disobedience. He had shown them one miraculous thing after another. Provided them food, even their sandals never wore out the forty years of walking in them. Deuteronomy 29:5

My Sunday sandals don’t last more than a year, yet they walked in theirs for forty?! Truly Amazing!

This leads me to ask; what things does God endure with me? He has done many miraculous things for me and my family. Looking back and re-reading old journals it is so evident. Yet God puts up with my attitude, doubt, and fear. I can’t point fingers at those Israelites’ – because I too, am guilty of a complaining spirit, or have allowed fear to keep me from moving forward. I am so thankful that God loves me so much that He endures me, HE puts up with me. And HE still wants to lead me into those things that He designed me for – those purposes.

Looking at His example of love I ask myself another question; have I “put up” with those around me, like God does with me? Do I keep loving and seeing the potential the person has and not look at the behavior of this person because of their doubt and fear?

Maybe some of the time, but more often than I would like to admit, I don’t.

So starting today, I asked God to help me love others like He has lavished love on me. And pray that my behavior would be pleasing to HIM and not something HE has to endure.

I love to read the different signs announcing encouragement for the New Year. One of my favorite encouraging thought is from a former Pastor of mine, he asked – “Did you think that you would have accomplished the things you have, in this past year at the beginning of the year?” In other words, on January 1st 2010 did you think that you could have accomplished all the things that you did by the end of the year?

No, to tell you the truth there are several things that I accomplished this past year that I wouldn’t have believed I would do. But it wasn’t without the Help, Strength, and Guidance of my LORD, GOD. So that leaves me asking; what is God going to do in my life this year, what things will HE help me step into? Is it a promise or maybe it will be my purpose? I am not sure what it will be but I can be guaranteed that HE will give me the courage and guidance to accomplish it.

God is always moving us into new things, moving forward, and take new steps of faith. He doesn’t want us to become idle. And to take new steps of faith it means stepping into areas that you have not yet walked before. Bottom line though, it means things are going to CHANGE!

Change is good, but sometimes it is hard to make that transition. I know that I need to make some changes in my life; I have felt this for several months now. But to be honest it is a little scary letting go of something you know and can physically see – to grab the unknown.

There are times I feel bold and confident, yet there are others when I feel afraid and timid. And as scary of a thought it is to ask this question, it puts things in different prospective for me. “If I had to choose between what I am doing now, or, having more time with my family, what would I do?” Well that is a no brainier, I would make those changes.

I am busy with many things in my life that I am constantly stressed. I am so eagerly wanting to walk into those things that God has pre-wrote in heaven for me – before I was even placed on this earth, yet I am not willing to trust HIM enough to let go of some of the things in my life that does not “promote life.”

Does that even make sense? Do you know what I mean?

I once heard, not sure if it was a song, or even a line in a movie but it went like this; “It is sad that some people don’t start living until they know they are dying.” Now I am not saying that I am dying, but what I am saying is that I don’t want to start living out my purpose for life at the end of my life.

I want to have faith and courage like Caleb;
Numbers 13:30 “We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it.

And like David the when he was a young Sheppard boy and he stood before the giant (1 Samuel 17:32-47).

At last – I ask you the same question that I was asked; if you had to choose between what you are doing now, or, having more time with family, what would you do?

Me? Well – I am going to make changes, with God’s strength and guidance I am going to let go of the things I know to grab a hold of the unknown.

I got up this morning in hopes that I could get my computer laptop working. It has been a long week-end which started Friday morning. My husband and I had taken the day off to get ahead start on moving our daughter into her first apartment in Michigan, about three and half hours away.

On Friday Bob had to go into work, even though he took the day off, to remove snow at the school parking lots so I decided to get up with him at 2:00 in the morning. I figured I would have a big chunk of time for writing; I am working on a project that actually has a deadline.

I was able to make excellent progress; I would say that I was 75% done when Bob came home around 10:00. So I decided to stop and go over what the game plan was for the week end. I also wanted to get the house cleaned up and my laundry done before we left because I didn’t know when we would get back home.

That is when the spinning started up. I have been having problems with dizziness for a little while now and the doctor had just given me motion sickness pills to take every six hours as needed. So here I go again, the spinning ride that I didn’t want to go on. I was so upset, I wanted to get so much stuff done, but there I was lying in the bed hoping that this spinning would stop. I did my little tricks to help it go away, drink salt water (not a lot of salt, just a little in my water) I tried eating crackers, I tried sitting up in a very slow motion and maybe I could just ‘reset’ my brain or something. WHO knows? After a couple of hours I was feeling better and started to kick it in gear and got some of my chores done before we left.

As we were packing up the car for our trip I decided to take my computer. I thought maybe I could get some more time in on my project and finish it. Mind you my computer was acting up on Friday but I didn’t think much of it.

We got to the farm, step one of the week end. Our plan was to get there and finish loading the trailer with the boxes that Ashley had at the farm when she was staying with Grandpa. But about two hours into our evening I started to get dizzy again. The rest of the night was shot; I just feel asleep on the couch and decided to give into the spinning. I didn’t have the energy to push through it again.

Saturday morning I got up early and thought I would work on my project before anyone got up, but I couldn’t turn on my computer. As much as I tried it wouldn’t work. Oh well, I thought to myself, I guess I am not suppose to work on this now, it is about moving Ashley today so I just put it away.

Things were going pretty good, Ashley was very stressed but it was going well, until we started to look for a mattress for her. “Here mom, try this one,” Ashley said. As soon as I lowered myself down on the mattress the room was spinning again. Not this again, I thought. At least we got Ashley’s stuff moved into her apartment, the guys did most of the work, I just stood by the door and opened it when they needed. So the rest of the afternoon I had to either hold onto someone’s arm or move very slowly, and not look at anything moving.

Ashley and her boyfriend in his truck and Bob and I in the car we all pulled back into the driveway at the farm about 6:30pm. Bob had gotten several calls from his boss about snow removal at the school so we had to drive back to Indiana yet that night. The whole drive home I slept, which I don’t ever do. I usually try to stay up and make conversation with Bob to keep him awake.

We pulled in the driveway, got all the stuff in the house and went to bed. Bob was extremely tired and physically sore from the move, Ashley’s apartment is on the second floor. Bob had to get up and go into the school Sunday morning for snow removal again. They didn’t get any snow in Michigan where we were but here in Indiana we had gotten about 8 inches at the house and I guess about 12 inches at the school.

So again, I thought perfect time for me to get some more writing done, maybe even finish the project.

Well, I guess not. My computer again will not turn on; I tried several times with no success. Trying hard not to cry and feel sorry for myself I decided that I had other things that I needed to do.

I got all the Christmas things put away and finished up on the laundry and wanted to vacuum the floor. Now vacuuming the floor is not a hard thing to do when you have a vacuum. We had given ours to Ashley so that she could save her money for other things, rent. So I thought, well, I will just use the shop vac that should work. No – didn’t work, filter needed replaced. Okay! I will just use our old rainbow that is out in the garage that we use for the car. Well… couldn’t find the attachments, to be completely honest that vacuum has moved with us so many times I am surprised that we even have it. Only thing left was the dust buster. So there I was on my hands and knees trying to vacuum the floor with it.

As I thought about my week end I just wanted to cry, it seemed that everything that I was trying to do wasn’t working out. I wasn’t feel good and I wanted to get so much done.

I told myself, I am not going to get mad or even feel sorry for myself! I will keep praising God for all my blessings! And then I stated list them off, out loud, all the things HE has blessed me with this week end. To be completely honest I am still disappointed about my computer, but what am I going to do about it now – Nothing.

But one thing I can say, I am thankful for my Lord God. By HIM showing me all my blessings I can be assured that He is still here with me protecting me. Things may not go as I plan, but I should be concern about HIS plan not mine, right? Maybe God wants me to just rest some more, and be ready for next week.  Things will work out on my project deadline, not really sure how, but know it will.

How about you? When things don’t go as planned or you feel as everything is against you, do you fall into a complaining spirit? Or do you even feel sorry for yourself? Try praising God, it doesn’t change your circumstances but it does change your attitude.

This morning I am amazed how I can become so passive at times, here lately it has been for several weeks, maybe even months. I know that GOD has designed for a specific purpose. His word tells me this in;
Ephesians 2:10
For we God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
But I have become distracted and discouraged over these several weeks. Mainly because I have been listening to the enemy whisper so softly that I didn’t even realize I was grabbing lies that he so cunningly deposited in my subconscious. I started to believe that I was just plain old Georgia. Who do I think I am? What can God do through me? How can I hope for such big things? I am not even trained in things I want to pursue.
I had to clear away the fog (if you will) and go before the throne of God and just pray and remember how much HE has carried me over this past year. How splendid HE is! Acknowledge HIS awesome mercy and HIS unconditional love for me. HE is GOD, creator of all!
I’ve coined an expression that I say to my family and the ladies in my bible study… “Look for the diamonds in your day” to encourage them to look for the positives and hold tight to them. In conversations at work, school or even at home. To value the people they meet on the course of the day, that there is always something positive to glean in our everyday lives. God is handing us diamonds all day long.
I have forgotten to look for my diamonds! I have been waiting for GOD to hand me the Millennium Star (one of world’s largest diamond measuring 203.04 carats) constantly looking for that “big thing” HE has designed me for! But what I have discovered, as I read the words that I have penned in my journal this past year, God has given me a wheel barrel full of diamonds! HE has answered prayers! HE has encouraged me! He has blessed me with victories, and He has given me little projects that I have stepped out in done but not seeing them as “Divine Purposes”. What I also realized today by reading my own words, I have been placing those diamonds gently in my jewelry box. I didn’t take the time to brush them off. I didn’t look closely at them with jewelry’s loupe (a magnifier used to inspect diamonds) or ask God to give me wisdom to define each diamond.
My prayer would be that as we step out of 2010 and into the New Year 2011 we would take the time to really study the (many) diamonds that God has blessed each one of us with. I ask that you don’t just place them in your jewelry box and forget about them but to look closely at each one, as I plan to do. Take each precious diamond; determine if they are a princess cut or marquise, ask God to give you HIS loupe (the Holy Spirit) to see things as they are. And hold tight to the wealth of wisdom, a treasure chest of diamonds that we all have received this past year.
So with all this said; I am calling out the enemies bluff! I am standing on the fact that GOD has plans for me!! I am grabbing hold of those divine purposes that GOD has created me for.
Do I know what that looks like? No, but I do know that GOD will reveal each step as HE hands me one diamond at a time.

This year I have been a little behind in the things that I do for Christmas. For instance I usually have my Christmas tree up and all my little decorations displayed no later than December 12. Well this year I didn’t get my tree up until December 22! Yes really! And I didn’t really go out shopping for presents until the 23rd & 24th.

My husband and I had an idea of what we wanted to get those on our list but there is several factors to consider when you go out shopping with only days left to Christmas: lots of traffic, long lines, everything picked over, and my level of strength to endure the physical and mental energy that it takes to go shopping for that perfect gift for a long period of time. Bottom line, I hate shopping! I do, I really don’t understand how some people do it every week.

I witness people just grabbing any thing to wrap up as a present, just to say that they gave one. No thought into it. I even seen people in the return line with bags full of returns, gifts that they had received at their extended family Christmas.

With in-laws, parent’s, step parents and all the different factors that make up a “Family” we sometimes end up all Christmas out by the time Christmas actually gets here.

So here I am Christmas morning looking at the wrapped presents that I have under the tree I ask myself these questions; “Will they appreciate it?” “Even though it doesn’t look like much, will they know how much of a financial sacrifice these gifts really are?” I want the person receiving our gifts to be thankful and value our presents, and to know how much we really love them.

Then I heard God ask me; “Will they appreciate my gift?” “Will they know how much of a sacrifice this gift of mine will have to make, for them?” “Do my children know how much I love them?” With that I had to weep, because I know that too many people do not appreciate HIS gift, HIS Perfect Gift, His SON Jesus. I would be so hurt if my child didn’t like his or her present. God must be heart broken, to have so many ignore the precious gift that HE has given us from Heaven. Then I have to ask myself this question; “Have I as a parent taught my children to truly value and appreciate this precious gift?”

My prayer would be that my family and friends would know how much God has given us, and to stop and honestly look how truly blessed we are to received the gift of FORGIVENESS when we accept HIS son Jesus.

“Hark! The Angles Sing, Glory to the NEW BORN KING!” Can you hear it? The heavens are singing!!