My first vision in 2018

To be more purposeful in 2018 I decided that my first acts should be different than the years before. So, on this Monday morning instead of getting around for work [had the day off] I decided to go to my quiet spot in the house.

First; I read over my journal pages of the previous year and highlighted those times I was instructed, encouraged, or found comfort at the feet of Jesus. As I listened to worship I felt the need to get on my knees and just thank Jesus for all (ALL) that HE has done. Not only the complete work of the cross, but what Jesus has done in my life personally.

Read more… “My first vision in 2018”

Increasing the speed doesn’t make time go by faster.

I had to run on the dreaded treadmill today at the gym. Only wanting to endure the machine for half an hour I started in, however the closer I was getting to the 30 minute mark I found myself increasing the speed. Like it would really make those minutes go any faster. I had to laugh once I realize what I was doing, it doesn’t matter how fast I am going. Thirty minutes is thirty minutes.

I instantly thought of the many times that I wanted to be farther down the road to that place where I would be walking out in my hearts desires (dreams and aspirations). There have been often times that I would be hard on myself, pushing to make things happen before I am ready. All those wonderful goals that I see in my heart and so badly want to achieve, I mentally turn up the speed on the treadmill (so to speak) as if it will get me there faster. But it’s a process, not a destination to become what God has designed me to be. It is a journey that my Heavenly Father is enjoying. And you what to know something… I am finally at a place of enjoying the journey now too. At least for today ‘wink’.

Philippians 1:6 AMP
I am convinced and confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in me will [continue to] perfect and complete it until the day of Christ Jesus [the time of His return].

Drop of Water

This is a picture I saw one morning a month or so ago when I went on my run. It was a morning after a heavy rain and the water had washed a path down the dirt road in which I live. I didn’t think much about the path until I was about 2 miles into my run. The heaviness I feeling made me feel that I was alone. My struggle to find my way in this transition I felt I was in made me feel as if I was lost in a dry land.

Then I saw this picture: it was one drop of water (representing me) slowly moving along in the sand. All of the sudden a another drop of water (representing ministries that I’ve been following) fell upon me, making the drop, or me, bigger and give me momentum (encouragement) to move a bit faster. However I was still in a very dry land and this picture went on for a while. Suddenly I could hear a rushing water (almost as if I was standing next to Niagara Falls) then my vision panned out and I could see a bigger area and what I saw was many droppings of water making their way across the dry land. The drops seemingly insignificant of their own, but when pulled together became a rushing river. We are pioneers making a path (like the path I saw on the side of our dirt road) for others in our family and in our communities, making the way a little easier. The remnants of our testimonies give others to faith and to be strong to keep moving forward. Praise God

I hope you are encouraged in this vision that I saw (and heard) it invigorated my spirit.

Laughter

Even before moving back here to Michigan I have been asking the Lord for more laughter in my life. I am not saying that I am a sad person. I just sometimes lose the ability to enjoy life: more focused on doing than being. Does that make sense?

I’ve gotten several words that ‘adventures, laughter, and joy’ are ahead for me. I have no doubt that God will bring these things into my life; however this past week I realized how the thief has stolen my laughter in the past, among other things. (John 10:10)

Recently my youngest child had gotten married, and my husband and I have been pray circling around the weekend for months. We prayed that heaven would come down and invade earth, for God to be a part of this union of love and that it would be a joyful celebration. I believe our prayers were answered, the weather was beautiful, family members put their differences aside (for the most part) and I felt the presence of heaven all around.

Even though I experienced many emotions over that 48 hour period, I think it was the first time in a long time I felt comfortable being ‘me’. I wasn’t thinking about what other people thought of me like I’ve done in the past. Not worrying about silly things (what might my face look like when I cry- my crooked smile etc.) I able allowed myself to be a little goofy. Yes, I even got on the dance floor with my children and laughed at myself.

It was all beautiful; I so enjoyed my family and friends. Yet, when the pictures / videos started to post on facebook, and instagram I started to think; ‘oh my goodness, I look like that?! What was I thinking?! What did the guest think?!’ Or worse: ‘what did my daughter – in – law’s family think?!’ As these questions started to roll into my thoughts I could feel myself start to feel inferior, ugly, and even foolish. I even started to feel shame that I wasn’t being very ‘godly’.

Really?!

After I stopped allowing these thoughts (negative self-talk) to take over in my mind, I realized where this was all coming from- it was coming from the enemy of my soul. This is how he has stolen my joy and laughter in the past, however NOT THIS TIME! I refuse to allow the enemy to engrave this ugly picture in my memory of that weekend. NOPE! It is, and always will be, a beautiful, laughter filled memory in my heart for all eternity.

Now wise to his schemes I only have a great anticipation for more laughter filled days head.