Yesterday my co-workers and I got some news that, in some way, did not surprise me. Our wonderful boss is taking another position at one of the other satellite offices. I am excited for her, really I am. New things to learn, closer to home, it is an adventure. Life becomes stagnant when we don’t change things up. Whenever opportunity opens up we should always prayfully consider it, not letting fear or complacency keep us from moving forward.

But on the flip side of this – all of us in Patient Services know how very blessed we have been working under such an awesome leader. Of course, some tears were shed after hearing the news, me included. But I can’t help be excited for her.

Yes, in the back of my mind I have been comfortable knowing that I have a boss that is just as much for me as an employee (a person) as she is for the organization she works for, enforcing rules and policies without an iron hand. But life isn’t about our comfort all the time, there is a much bigger plan going on and if we would look at things in that way we could be happy for the opportunities that open up for other people.

I suggested that we in patient services pray that the person that is chosen to replace our boss would be just as wonderful. But to think things would be the same would be silly. In fact I told my co-worker that we can’t grow if things never change. She looked at me with tears in her eyes and said; “I don’t want to grow.”

Fear washes over us when things change because we don’t know how it is going to affect us – our world, and maybe even our comfort. I am just being honest, I am the same way. My boss has been so wonderful and supportive when it comes to encouraging me in my enthusiasm and desire to pursue my dreams – she just understands my heart. The selfish side of me wants to say; “No- things can’t change!” But life it isn’t about me, making Georgia comfortable.

Everyone around us is growing and changing, things never stay the same. If you’re a parent you know this to be true, as our children grow older our parenting roles change.

Not a bad thing, it is just a fact of life, things change and those changes… grow us.


Another Form of Pride

I have been going to the doctors a lot here lately – just trying to find answers of why I feel the way I do. There are certain symptoms that I experience at all times and then there are some that I experience irregularly. It is enough to drive one batty; I have even started to believe that it might just be all in my head. But my sister in law, who is a nurse, has assured me that it isn’t. She has seen me when I have felt my worse and agrees that there is something going on.

With the many different symptoms that I have it is hard to pin point on area to look, it seems that the doctors pick the most expensive tests to do first – when a simple blood “work up” might just show root to some of the problems. But that is another subject for another time. At least I have met my deductable.

And to make it more fun for me, I also have had those routine exams, which threw me a curve ball when it came back abnormal. At first I wasn’t bothered by it, just kind of figured the mammogram technician did get a good enough view, that maybe I moved or something. But when I went back in they assured me that something was revealed and they wanted to do more views. Then they wanted to do an ultra sound which confirmed there is a “spot” on my left breast. By the time I left that second appointment I was all shook up, and maybe even scared.

I went into work and tried to make it through day without thinking about it too much. First off – needles scare me and even though I didn’t want to think the worse I found my mind drifting that way. I had to pull my thoughts together – line them up with the word of God.

Philippians 4:8 whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.

Not what ever is false (not sure of), what ever is scary – that brings fear, what ever is without hope, whatever is unpleasant, what ever is unworthy, if anything is poor or blameworthy – think about such things.

It was rough but got threw the day – I just want to say a lot of mercy was extended to me too and I am very grateful.

The next morning Bob and I were talking and he told me what his boss had shared with him about the experience he and his wife went through, it was all very encouraging, but I was upset with Bob for sharing what was going on. He just told me that I was being silly, the more people lifting us up in prayer the better. And that I was being unreasonable.

I thought about it most of the morning. I didn’t know if I wanted people to know that I have been going through some things in my life that would require prayer. I have no problem listing my pray requests for my family and friends but not me.

Why? I have no clue, because I am far from having it all together and that I need lots of prayers.

So this morning when Bob and I got to church (Crystal Valley Missionary Church) I had a thought in the back of my head that Bob has told everyone about what was going on and they would all want to pray with me as soon as I walked in.

But, it didn’t happen that way. No one, in fact, mentioned it. Which made me feel like maybe it wasn’t that big of a deal that I had to have more testing done. Then during service Pastor Chris was talking about “unpacking” our stuff. Those things that God keeps bring up that we haven’t dealt with.

When the pastor closed in prayer I heard God say that I had pride. Then He asked me a few things; “Why don’t you want people to pray for you? If you do have someone pray with you – it is only a few chosen ones. Do you think that if you sufferer and walk through this alone that you will have more of a testimony? No, Georgia, you have pride. Get rid of it and let my people pray with you.”

Wow- that put some prospective on things for me, God was right I only have a few pray for me for certain things but the “big” things I tend to keep to myself. I guess I don’t ask because I don’t want to sound like I am weak or too needed. As soon as I confessed my pride to God and told him that I do want people to pray for me – a couple that has never prayed with me before came up and said; “I don’t normally do this but I felt that God wanted me to pray for you.” What an awesome God we have! To correct us and love on us all the same time.

Remember this, when we ask for prayer it isn’t that we are weak or too needed, we open the door for God to work through others to minister to us.

With all this said – I humble myself and ask that you would lift me up in your prayers on Thursday March 10 when I go in for more testing.

Thank you and God Bless.



In Bible study this past week I learned about PEACE and was reminded of some things that I known but had forgotten. Rediscovering Gods word in this area I come to realize that I had lost my peace, with worry and fear. All along I have been telling myself that I have peace and that I trust God with all things, but I was only fooling myself, because in my head I was still worrying about the little things that I felt was my responsibility to worry about.

Silly! I know because the Word says not to worry (Matthew 6:-34) it doesn’t add one day to your life. In fact I believe worry and stress can take away from your life. If not shorten your life it does take away the quality of life that your living. I remember back a few years ago I really believed that if I didn’t worry about things I was being irresponsible and that I didn’t care. What a lie from the enemy! We have concerns but we are to take those concerns to the Lord and leave it there, trust HIM to work it out.

Somewhere down the road I started picking up those small packages of worry, holding on to it gently as if they were a fine crystal glass, very carefully I have been carrying it around. And of course I can’t just have one crystal glass, I need a whole set. I found other things to worry about that tie into the one. You know how it plays out in our heads; “if this happens then that will happen, and what about that over there.” Yeah a whole set of worries. Where’s my peace? Gone!

Don’t get me wrong, I really believe I have grown a lot in trusting God these past 3-4 years and I have found peace in the mist of the most difficult times. Like when I had indescribable peace when Bob, my husband, was unemployed for over a year and we almost lost our house. I just knew beyond a shadow of doubt that we would be okay, I didn’t know how it would turn out but knew we would be okay.

But here I am, not sure how I got here, I lost my peace and maybe my joy too. I guess with me looking for that “perfect” time in my life; I am missing out on life. It is kind of like when I keep thinking in the back of my mind that Bob and I will plan a trip to the Caribbean when I can look perfect in a swim suit. Ah! Yeah! That might never happen- looking “perfect” in a swim suit. But does that mean that I don’t want to ever go to the Caribbean?

God knows my hearts desires and He also knows what I am fearful of. But I guess I have been looking for a way to “tweak” my life – change things a little bit here and a little bit there, I would have peace and I could walk out in the things that God has for me.

Really! Who do I think I am? God knows the plans HE has for me. He can see the big picture. I need to let HIM be God over my life. I pray; “Your will be done,” but yet I keep trying to make it my will.

So to find peace again in my life I am going to just get back to the basics! First, I need to remember my joy, that my name is written in the Lambs book of life. How wonderful is that! Second, I need to trust that God sees and knows all things. ALL THINGS! Nothing happens to a hair on my head that HE doesn’t already know about. HE knows the plans for me and HE is working those things out beyond my realm of understanding. TRUST!!

And third, I need to dig back into my word and allow HIM to show me things. I can’t explain the wonderful PEACE and JOY I have when I receive knowledge from reading my scriptures, when GOD gives me new understanding.

I am sure I will find myself again on this road of worry (because it sneaks into our lives so easily) but I pray that I won’t travel miles down it before I realize that I am lost.


Self Talk

This week my son was very upset about a grade that he received and he was going on and on how “stupid” he was for making such mistakes on his test. It got to the point that I was getting very aggravated with him. As much as I tried to encourage him, he had the mind set to keep speaking negative things about himself. I told him, “What you believe about yourself will determine whether or not you walk out your God given purposes or not.”

What great wisdom I shared with him, “it must have been from God himself.” And usually I am pretty positive with the things I think about myself, until yesterday morning – that is when my wise words went out the door.

I had asked a close friend of mine, Vicki, to meet me at Kohl’s Saturday morning so that I could find something nice to wear when I share my testimony on the 12th. I wish I could still say shopping for clothes for myself is one of my favorite things to do but it is the most hated! When I was in my 20’s it was exciting! I could grab anything off the rack and I would look fabulous in it. It was so much fun; I would not be afraid to look in the mirror and see how well the clothes fit me.

Vicki, she puts herself together so nicely. She uses layers, scarf’s, necklaces, all kinds of things (that I wouldn’t think of) to put the finishing touch on her outfit. With the assurance that she would steer me in the right direction I was excited.

Wouldn’t you know it I got up Saturday morning with this huge headache. Oh I can’t have this now, I thought. My eyes were swollen and I had dark rings under my eyes. Now really how am I supposed to have a good attitude about myself when I look like this?!

Before we met I told Vicki not to let me leave without buying something that I don’t have anything in my closet that will work for the 12th.  That is what I normally do; I will talk myself out of buying a new outfit, thinking I got to have something in my closet to wear.  When I see all the wonderful, colorful clothes hanging on the racks I envision the 20 year old Georgia wearing it. I grab the size I need (want to wear) and go to the dressing rooms – only to be so disappointed when I see the 40 (+) image in the mirror struggling to get the darn thing zipped!

The first place that Vicki wants to go to find my outfit is the “JUNIORS.” Oh my goodness, I don’t want to go there. I don’t want to be defeated on my very first pair of jeans that I try on!

“I am not sure about this Vicki,” I told her as she led me to the juniors.

“It will be okay Miss Georgia,” she assured me.

After finding a few pairs of jeans I went to the dressing room, my eyes avoided the mirror as I tried them on.  Oh! I guess I can get them on and zipped but… they are a little low cut. Heck if I was to bend over and pick something up my back side would be showing. No, not comfortable in these.

I kept telling myself it wasn’t because my backside was huge, it was because most of the people that manufacture these jeans have a smaller frame than us westerners – I hope that isn’t politically incorrect to say.

“Keep breathing Georgia, it is okay, you can do this.  You got to be positive, don’t show your insecurity.  How many times have you taught the ladies in your Bible study that you need to know who you belong to?  Remember that you belong to God of all creation, and HE created you.  Chin up! Don’t compare yourself with anyone. You can do this.” I kept telling myself over and over in my head.

But!  After about an hour into this search to find something that looks good on me and that I am comfortable wearing my thoughts got negative.  I know that Vicki could see the defeat on my face.  As much as she tried to encourage me I had the mindset to put myself down. Sound familiar?

Three hours later I was at the check out line at Kohl’s. I did end up putting the jeans up but got a couple of sweaters, a necklace, and a pair of earrings.  Of course Vicki suggested bigger pieces of jewelry but I told her “baby steps Miss Vicki, baby steps.”

As I struggled the rest of the day – my self talk and attitude got worse.  I started to doubt all kinds of things, especially the things that I am trying to walk out in, those purposes that God has created me for.  “I got to be an example to my family and friends to trust God.  I believe that God created me to bring glory to HIM, so what is the problem?  How can I bring Glory to God with this defeated, negative attitude? Snap out of it Georgia,” I told myself.

The rest of the day was a constant battle to “think” positively about myself.  Then I read one paragraph that was penned by Joyce Meyers, and it was exactly what I needed to read.  I am only quoting a few lines from her book, The Confident Woman.

Proverbs 31:26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

“Not only do we have the capability of speaking life or death to other people; we have the same ability in our own lives.  We can speak words that build confidence in ourselves and others or we can speak words that destroy confidence.”

I felt like God was saying to me, “Georgia, come on now, your stepping into new ground, you know that I am with you.  You are my child and I love you.  Don’t let the enemy pull you back to the pit of darkness with that negative self talk.  Remember all the things that I, your God, have helped you through.”  Then I had a vision that He has given me before. It is of me when I was a small girl, long dark hair, going down a path, hand and hand with the Creator of all, with no fears I skipped along with HIM.

I have said this many times before, look for the diamonds in your day.  Hold onto the positive things.  Know who you belong to.  You have been created to do good things with God has prepared in advance for you to do.  And remember “What you believe about yourself will determine if you walk out those purposes or not.” And even though I say these things over and over, I still can get caught up in the snare of negative self talk.  Only with Gods help am I able to step out of this mental pit of darkness.

So I am speaking this to myself as much as I speak it to you.  Guard your self talk, those things you say about yourself!  Make sure that they line up with what God says about you.  This is a matter of a God purposed filled life or death.


Our lives speak volumes

This week has had its ups and downs.   There were times that I got stuck in the “right now” with fear and doubt pushing in on me – forgetting that God sees the big picture for my life.  The fear and doubt was only based on what I was experiencing in that moment.   Doctor appointments, tests, then more doctor appointments; it is enough to make a person really “freak out”.

This morning I stopped to look back of how God has worked things out in the past.  Again I am reminded God has it all in His hands.  He knows what is next.  Even looking back at this week specifically I can see His hand working things out.

This week I have received answers to questions, opportunities to pursue my heart’s desires, and encouragement to step out in those things.  Best of all… ANSWERED PRAYERS!!  Those prayers that I have prayed for my loved ones to truly hear God.   And for them to know that GOD has their very best interest in mind. I am so excited to see the evidence of it in my family.

Not only do I pray these things for my family but I need to live it in my own life.  You know how the saying goes; our lives speak louder than words.  How we handle different situations speaks volumes to those around us!  Someone once wrote; our lives may be the only bible some people read.

I would hope and pray that as I walk out my life my loved ones would see that I am truly seeking God, putting my trust HIM.  Even though I may not know what is next, I will trust HE is with me.

Yeah, I will fall, and at times even sit in the puddle of fear and doubt – but I believe that is when God calls down his angles to minister to me, help me stand up again and cheer me on into the things of GOD.

I find comfort in the verse Hebrews 1:7 … He makes his angels’ winds, his servants flames of fire.  Do you visualize it? God calls his angles down to our need, and with their angelic wings they fan the flame inside us.

So with all said and done this past week my prayer would be that the people around me heard me live out my faith and trust in God, even though I have had my moments of fear and doubt.